Isaiah 40:31 (New International Version)
31 but those who hope in the LORD
will renew their strength.
They will soar on wings like eagles;
they will run and not grow weary,
they will walk and not be faint.
This will be a quick one- Gemma is asleep, temporarily, in her bouncy seat next to me. We've come up with a new plan with our pediatrician and the clinicians we've seen at Children's. I will continue thickening all her feeds, whether breast milk in a bottle or formula with rice cereal. I am going to taper off pumping. I have like zero time during the day to pump as it is since her feedings take so long so I'm going to only pump as I can and give her at least one bottle a day of breast milk. Every little bit helps.
Our doctor is trying to get our insurance company to approve Prevacid for Gemma as a reflux med. Since standard of care says we need to use Zantac first(which is a thin liquid that she can aspirate) we have a bunch of hoops to jump through to get Prevacid approved. Also, the doctor wants to put Gemma on Pulmocort (an inhaled steroid) to keep her airway calm and clear through flu season. The primary concern is any little bug can cause major infection since she already has fluid in her lungs and an irritated airway.
So, we are on house arrest. Sorry to those of you who want to come and visit- we have been told to limit her contact with people outside Abe and I. Also, anyone who even has a shadow of a cold has to steer clear completely. That means my plans of taking my girl Christmas shopping with me are definitely off the table for now. No church, no grocery shopping, no errands unless we are driving through. I'm bummed that I'm bound to the house, especially since the house is such a disaster, it stresses me out to look around. However, keeping Gemma healthy is my primary focus and we'll camp out here until she is healed.
Please join us in praying for complete healing of her airway, so there is no aspiration and complete healing of her reflux. Please pray she is healed by the next appointment we have in 6 weeks- if not way sooner! Please pray she has zero ZERO negative side affects from any of the meds we decide to put her on- especially the Pulmocort. I know God is able and this could be so much worse but it's hard seeing your baby in pain, gagging, unable to breathe or eat. Thankfully, we are able to get enough in to her that she is gaining weight- not as much as we would like but I'm working on it! As of right now, she sleeps on my chest inclined so that her reflux doesn't bother her so much. She sleeps pretty well, me on the other hand... not so much.
It's amazing how much I love this little girl and how overwhelmed I am. Pray for peace and patience for me- wisdom for Abe and I as we continue to navigate unknown situations- and guidance for all of our many doctors who continue to give Gemma wonderful care!
The Lord is faithful. This is the child we prayed for and I know He made her for Abe and I to parent. She is God's precious jewel and our beloved daughter. My heart swells to bursting when I look at her. When I have a spare moment, I promise I will take a picture or two.
Until then, picture her wrapped snugly and sleeping soundly... for now. Her tiny left hand is folded in her blanket and her right arm is sticking straight out. She is breathing smoothly, the tiny hairs on her head pulsing with her heartbeat in her soft spot. She's breathtaking...
...and I think she needs a diaper change. :)
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