Saturday, June 5, 2010
22 Weeks and a girl
So, we found out what we're having: a little girl! I'm really excited and so is Abe although he is already thinking ahead to dating and weddings and feeling stressed...
Plenty of time for that later. I wanted to post another picture for those of you who don't see me every day. What a difference 7 weeks makes! Wow! I'm over half way there and feeling pretty good. I'm feeling her kicking and punching and I love it. It reminds me that she's in there and that she's alive! Feeling her little moves in my belly is really amazing. That being said, I can't wait to hold her in my arms and feel her little squirming body for real!
My best friend Heather just had her daughter Evalyn Joy on Wednesday June 2nd and it made me all the more excited to be having a little girl. To be able to raise our little ladies together is going to be really special. I can't wait to watch our daughters carry on our friendship (let's hope they like each other!). Please continue to keep Evalyn in your prayers as she is still in the NICU working on her breathing. We are hoping she'll be home in a week or so.
I'm starting to feel fearful about the delivery and post delivery life with my little one so I'm going to spend this summer really focusing myself on being ready for her. I bought a devotional journal called Jesus: 90 days with the One and Only by Beth Moore and look forward to starting my morning in a centered, focused way- inviting God into my frazzled world and allowing Him to make peace out of all of this.
I read over all my blog posts from when we lost our first baby and felt really emotional over not only the loss of our baby but over the distance I feel between me and God right now. I know in that crisis, I felt God's presence so distinctly and so tangibly. I am entering into a new season in my life where responsibilities are changing drastically and I need that intimacy with God. So, I'm handing over my fear and pressing into the palm of the creator so that I am the mother God wants me to be to my little girl. I know I won't be perfect- I'm so thankful that I don't have to be. I am filled with love for this little life inside me and that's a beautiful place to start. I'm just praying I hear God's voice leading me and that I don't take Him for granted. All in all, though, I am doing well and waiting with breathless anticipation for baby girl Wolfe.
Even though I am feeling good, moving easily, and sleeping pretty well sometimes I pass a mirror and I feel like this:
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